A guy is visiting San Francisco, and walks into a small store in Chinatown.
He notices a small bronze statue of a rat.
He asks the owner "how much", and the owner replies "$50 for the bronze rat, and $1000 for the story behind it."
The guy says, "forget the story", and buys the rat.
As he's walking down the street he notices two live rats following him. As he continues to walk, more rats start following him.
He starts to get a little concerned, and heads for the waterfront. By the time he gets there there are thousands and thousands of rats following him.
He walks up to the end of the pier and throws the bronze rat into the bay, and the rats all follow and leap off of the pier and drown.
The guy rushes back to the store and walks in. The owner says, "Ah!, so your back for the story".
The guys says, "No, I was wondering if you have any bronze liberals?"
Obama jokes? Liberal jokes? You bet! We are your home for real Barack Obama jokes, & real anti-liberal jokes, not that softball stuff. Just because you tell a joke about Obama, or a liberal doesn't make you a racist, or a bigot. So lighten up, and have some fun.
Showing posts with label Liberal Misc.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Liberal Misc.. Show all posts
No Nativity in Washington
There will be no Nativity Scene in Washington this year.
The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a Nativity Scene in the United States Capital this Christmas season.
This isn't for any religious reason; they simply have not been able to find Three Wise Men in the Nation's Capital
A search for a Virgin continues.
There was no problem, however, in finding enough asses to fill the stable.
The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a Nativity Scene in the United States Capital this Christmas season.
This isn't for any religious reason; they simply have not been able to find Three Wise Men in the Nation's Capital
A search for a Virgin continues.
There was no problem, however, in finding enough asses to fill the stable.
The Robot Bartender
A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he noticed that the bartender was a robot. The robot clicked to attention and asked, "Sir, what will you have?"
The man thought a moment then replied, "A martini please."
The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the man had ever had.
The robot then asked, "Sir, what is your IQ?"
The man answered "oh, about 164."
The robot then proceeded to discuss the theory of relativity, inter-steller space travel, the latest medical break throughs, etc.
The man was most impressed. He left the bar but thought he would try a different tact. He returned and took a seat. Again the robot clicked and asked what he would have? "A Martini please."
Again it was superb. The robot again asked "what is your IQ sir?"
This time the man answered, "Oh about 100". So the robot started discussing Nascar racing, the latest basketball scores, and what to expect the Dodgers to do this weekend.
The guy had to try it one more time. So he left, returned and took a stool. Again a martini, and the question, "What is your IQ??"
This time the man drawled out "Uh, 'bout 50."
The robot clicked then leaned close and very slowly asked,
"A-r-e y-o-u s-t-i-l-l g-l-a-d y-o-u v-o-t-e-d f-o-r O-B-A-M-A?"
The man thought a moment then replied, "A martini please."
The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the man had ever had.
The robot then asked, "Sir, what is your IQ?"
The man answered "oh, about 164."
The robot then proceeded to discuss the theory of relativity, inter-steller space travel, the latest medical break throughs, etc.
The man was most impressed. He left the bar but thought he would try a different tact. He returned and took a seat. Again the robot clicked and asked what he would have? "A Martini please."
Again it was superb. The robot again asked "what is your IQ sir?"
This time the man answered, "Oh about 100". So the robot started discussing Nascar racing, the latest basketball scores, and what to expect the Dodgers to do this weekend.
The guy had to try it one more time. So he left, returned and took a stool. Again a martini, and the question, "What is your IQ??"
This time the man drawled out "Uh, 'bout 50."
The robot clicked then leaned close and very slowly asked,
"A-r-e y-o-u s-t-i-l-l g-l-a-d y-o-u v-o-t-e-d f-o-r O-B-A-M-A?"
What is the difference between Liberalism and Communism?
Question: What is the difference between Liberalism and Communism?
Answer: The Communist admit it.
Answer: The Communist admit it.
How many Liberals does it take to change a light bulb?
Question: How many Liberals does it take to change a light bulb?
Answer: It takes ten, nine to deny that darkness exists and one to hire a Republican to change it.
Answer: It takes ten, nine to deny that darkness exists and one to hire a Republican to change it.
What’s the difference between an Iraq terrorist and a liberal?
Question: What’s the difference between an Iraq terrorist and a liberal?
Answer: The Iraq terrorist makes fewer demands.
Answer: The Iraq terrorist makes fewer demands.
How do you confuse a liberal?
Question: How do you confuse a liberal?
Answer: You don’t, they are born that way
Answer: You don’t, they are born that way
Why can’t liberals find facts?
Question: Why can’t liberals find facts?
Answer: They aren’t looking for any.
Answer: They aren’t looking for any.
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